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PicFantastique8058

Bonjour,

Pouvez vous m’aider encore une fois à corriger mon texte anglais, SVP?

Merci

Chinese Traditional Festival  

                           a little presentation of winter solstice

The last day of school, December 22, is not only a sign of relaxation but also a Chinese traditional festival— winter solstice(or Dongzhi). This historical festival involves some customs that people still practice today. Let's take a look at it together.

The source of this festival goes back to ancient times. The ancient Chinese created 24 solar terms according to Natural rhythm changes. Winter solstice, which has the shortest day and the longest night, is the second term. Since the Han dynasty, People began to consider this day as a festival. According to them, this day is a “lucky day” because the winter solstice signifies the return of the sun. Since this solar term, The height of the sun begins to rise, and the daytime begins to increase. So, Chinese ancestry celebrated this day for the sun's rebirth and the augmentation of “Yang''(according to yin yang philosophy, yang is a positive energy that is good for health and raised by the sun’s height. )This antique festival passes through several dynasties and continues to be celebrated by China.

In different Chinese regions, the winter solstice involves radically different customs. But there is one thing in common in whole China - a time for families to get together. On this day, families in southern China will make sesame tang yuan ( glutinous rice balls) that symbolize reunion and eat them. But, in northern China, more people eat dumplings. Northerners believe that eating ear-shaped dumplings can prevent the ears from freezing. Some Chinese who have the Veneration of the dead would visit their ancestors’ graves and pay their respects by worshipping. So, all Chineses celebrate the winter solstice, but in different ways.

Winter solstice occurs in an important place in Chinese tradition. Every Chinese person, no matter their geographical location, remembers this day and celebrates it in their way with their family. Are you interested in this festival? Eat sesame tang yuan or dumplings!

Emilie L

Bonjour PicFantastique8058, 

Comme mentionné plus tôt, ce matin ton texte est très bon. 

Après avoir relu rapidement, je n’ai pas retrouvé d’importantes erreurs de grammaire. Cependant, afin de rendre celui-ci encore meilleur, je t’invite à revoir certains passages qui utilisent beaucoup de mots pour exprimer une idée précise. Par exemple, ces deux passages pourraient revus : « …people began to consider this day as a festival » ou « … in common in whole China… ». De plus, je t’invite aussi à revoir certaines phrases comme la deuxième phrase de ta conclusion afin de la rendre plus facile à lire.

Ceci étant dit, ce sont des suggestions pour embellir ton texte, car il est très bon tel quel. 

Bon travail ! 

Emilie